Keep Moving Forward

Ok where to start because a lot has happen since the last time I blogged. I just have too much to blog about so I will start with yesterday. My mom and sister came to visit yesterday, so instead of the normal and having Ashleigh freak the hell out about getting the house clean and this and that. I told her that I would take care of the house and she just go to the gym and to take her time. Well push come to shove I achieved my goal of momma not freaking out but instead I did. I guess I just got overwhelmed and just got burnt out too quick. Not to mention that the kids were AGAIN on their high horse and being all sorts of Defiant. So finally we (me and momma) had enough and I told chase (very calmly) to go to his room (to give us a break for a min) and he turned to me and said "Your mean Daddy, Your being really Mean" ooooooooooh lord. So I am now pissed and it took everything in my power not to snap.. RDC mode came out and he went to his room. We all needed a break at that point but who doesn't hit that point from day to day? My mom and sis are only hear for a couple more days, They got here yesterday at about 5:30ish PM have a wedding to go to on Saturday and are leaving some time on Sunday because my sister has to go to school Monday. The Navy Ball is tomorrow I cant wait its going to be a great time just me and momma all dressed up! Its going to be nice real nice.. Then again anytime with my beautiful wife is a great time even when the kids are being their normal. Today was a all right day, ok hold on let me retract that and say this morning was ok. Woke up and my mom wanted dunkin so after Chase got dropped off at school I took her and my sis to get dunkin and came home, momma went to the gym and came back after picking up Chase at school, then I had to haul ass to work to pick up some stuff for the Navy ball since I am part of the Honor Committee, and then had a drill inspection to do at 2:00pm. And that is where the day started going down hill fast! I gave the division (getting ready to graduate next week or so) on their last drill inspection 3 un sats which isn't good but isn't bad but for FEP you usually see better, not to mention after the inspection was over and I started debriefing the RDC's and their RCPO, We all hear a loud "SMACK" followed by the entire division "Training Time Out, Training Time Out". Running over to where they were pointing to there was a dumb ass recruit on the deck wide awake but locked his knees so he fainted. After the inspection I had to go back to the office to turn in my sheet and update a traffic pattern for the Recruits. That is one of my other job's I am in charge of the recruit traffic on base, I write the patters they should follow and if they don't they get points taken away from their divisional score. Any way I get to the office and its friggin locked and my office key is on my Honda key ring WHICH IS AT THE HOUSE grrrrrrr. Had to get the key from the Quarter Deck (which is only 20ft away) then got the traffic pattern changed email sent out and on my way home after receiving a message from momma (after asking if everything is ok) that the kids have not taken a nap yet and they are driving her beond nuts. Now for Grace to not take a nap is bad for everyone. And poor momma being home all alone because my sister went out with her dad and my mom was upstairs sleeping at 4:00 in the afternoon?!?! So what they say is right if momma ain't happy NO ONE IS HAPPY!!!!! LMAO J/K love you baby! Well that is pretty much it for today besides that my lovely mommy got me GH3 for Wii today!!. I will try to get on again maybe Sunday to let you know how the Navy Ball went. Have a great night and see you all soon.

Getting frustrated

Ok so i know i haven't been on in a couple days. But there is allot of things that have been going on. 1st off Chase has been a ROYAL shit lately being even more defiant then the day before, and with Ash and I trying to turn over a new leaf with him about being so strict on stupid little things. and ohhhhh boy does he know it, the other day he bit a kid at school for no reason and then would not listen to a word the teacher said. its getting so hard not to yell at him or swear at him. I have defiantly reached my limit and so has momma. Not only that my car decided to shit the bed again this time i have really no idea what is wrong with it, I thought it was the timing but i got that fixed and now the car starts but dies when i hit the gas. so now im down to it has to be a spark issue. this whole thing has been going on for about a week now and we are ready to just get rid of the friggin car. but honestly at this point i want to keep the car and just fix it the way i want to. Ash on the other hand is R E A D Y to get rid of it. how do i convince her to let me get another motor??? The one i want and to do it the right way this time? i think i just asked her because she reads this as well.. but any way when it shit the bed we started talkin that we needed a car like NOW so we went around and looked at a couple of places all said no. Lets be honest here i dont have the best credit in the world but i have a good pay check. and with the economy the way it is no one is going to lend. so then we decide to go online and go to a place called Bar none. now is where the phone calls started. we get one phone call saying that we are Pre approved so is there a way we can come down and get the ball rolling. Ash canceled her plans and we loaded up the kids to drive through Chicago traffic at 6pm is when we left our house. didnt get to the dealership till 715 on a 25min drive!!! W T F O?? meet the guy and he ran my credit AGAIN sat around for an hour waiting for a big fat NO. im sorry but what the flip does pre approved mean then?! not only that we canceled plans loaded the kids up past their bed time so they were cranky kind of just to waist our gas to get a friggin NO after being pre approved.. F off you pricks....... we get home and say were going to wait and the phone calls keep commin some from the same place and we told them we were just there yesterday and you told us no. Really who did you talk to ? so the name got dropped and we get a let me call you back.. no call. so this other place i decided to go to today by myself with the kids, because i wasnt going to have momma cancel her plans again said we can get you in "Something" but you need at least 1,000 down...... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH no dude if i had that i would just fix my car and deal with that.. that place is just a long story i dont feel getting into right now. But what i will say is they tried to get me into a POS 96 Nissan that was all rusted out and ect. Im sorry but if i would have brought that home momma would have shot me in the face.. on top of that Chase was being his normal self (annoying) as all hell driving me insane. so like i said before i might as well just save for the motor i want and do it the right way. Then another thing i am getting irritated is the fact that Ash and i have put some very touchy and secret stuff in our past that other people think they know.. and because she had a falling out with some one who thinks they know and thought they were just helping out when all this started with me and momma. started talking shit AGAIN about shit they dont know.. why dont you just shut up, just because your not happy in your frigging marriages stay the fuck out of mine. why dont you learn to put your 2cents in to some one who cares, better yet here is a fucking quarter buy your self a life cause that is all you are worth in my book. your lucky i dont take a phone and shove it somewhere.. oh wait you might like it cause that is the most your gettin.. it just really gets to me that people just thrive on this stuff, trying to make other people miserable just to make their lives look better in their eyes. Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.. Me and momma are doing great but there was a time that we wernt and this is where this quote comes to play.. "if your going to hell just keep going through" (Winston Churchill) my interpretation of that is its gotta get better soon or once you hit bottom the only way to go is up. and we are. so back the fuck off and leave us alone....... ok im sorry now that i got that out its been bugging me all day and this blog now turned into a rage. its 2 in the morning and my beautiful wife just fell asleep so i think i am going to end this and try to get some shut eye before my kids get up in like 3 hours. night all and same as always thanks for taking the time.. see ya next time..

What a wonderfull day

Ok so today not to much to talk about so this one is going to be kind of short. So this morning we actually got to sleep in till 0900 but we shouldn't have because yet again Grace ended up taking her diaper off and there was a nice log in her crib. How did we find out you ask? Chase "mommy Gracie poop again". We got up kids in bath and laundry started. Momma made a wonderful breakfast then got the day started. Had to get working on my car (had to change the CV boots) and I thank Ash for letting me get it done because I KNOOOOOW how much she hates it when I am in the garage working on that flippin car, and I understand because it takes the time away from US. I got the drivers side done back on (I really started last night) then got the passenger side up and started. We went and ran a couple of errands then got ready for a birthday party, then had to go feed a friends dog because they are out for the weekend and came home to finish the passenger side CV boot. Now its just time to wind down and go to bed soon. I just have to say it does feel good working on my own car! Its a feeling of accomplishment saying I did this when its all said and done. Then on top of all that I was out front smoking yesterday and a Fedex truck stopped by in front of the house, so I get all excited because im waiting on my lowering springs that I bought of Ebay fro 60$. The guy comes out from the back of the truck asking me if I was waiting on a package, AHH yeah we are actually waiting on a couple of packages. Momma got me something don't know what it is but I know its commin.. So I let the driver know that I am waiting on something, he then tells me that he has a package for me on his inventory but nothing on his truck. I then called Fedex to find out where the hell it is and its in Northbrook still in the store and would be out for delivery until Tuesday all because someone thought that my home address was a business address that would be closed on Sat. That was all yesterday so im going to wrap it up and run into today.


We had a normal morning got up and we made the arrangement yesterday that we would stay in PJ's most of the day (which we succeeded but ill get into that in a bit). just lounged around the house for a bit had a get your own bfast watched a little TV and put Grace down for her nap and that is where we begin. I made the comment on my facebook that it is kind of funny that your own kids now when you just want a relaxing day. They will do everything out of the normal to change your plans to what they want, Its really amazing. Why I am saying this is because Chase heard Grace wake up as always and I stroll upstairs to see what is going on and as soon as I turn the corner I start hearing her just talking away. Get a little closer to her door and the stench just overwhelmed me and her door was closed. Now hold on a min close your eyes and use your imagination on what i am about to tell you i set the tone for you now you need to just imagine.




Here we go i open the door and Grace of course smiles at me with her beautiful smile that just lets me know she is so happy to see me when she woke up. But even though she is so damn cute she was COVERED from head to toe in poop. Yeah let me say it again COVERED IN POOP. she then points to her bed and tells me "DADA POOP!" I smiled and said yeah baby poop then had to lean against the door frame and call for Ash, she had to see what i was looking at. So i said "you have to see this, Bring the wipes" that's when i hear from Ash "Ohhhhhh Nooooooo" and then i tell her to bring the camera and without seeing it i know she knew what had happen cause then ash said "that cant be good". Grace had taken off her diaper before she went and decided to finger paint everywhere. And i don't have the best gag reflex in the world, there have been times when changing her or Chase that the smell just gets the best of me and i dry heave over and over again until Ashleigh has to tell me to stop she will take over and i need to go get some air. But surprisingly i was completely fine until we were trying to get Grace to make a gagging sound (which she was and it was funny as hell) but then she started licking her cheek, That is when i lost it started dry heaving opening up every window yelling "ok ok ok im done i cant look anymore please get her in the tub please ill clean the crib up". So i had to get the bleach disinfectant wipes and scrub the hell out of her crib. Get the pillow case, pillow and blankets in the wash (which i should go up and start it again because its been sitting all day). And take the mattress out side to spray it down with a cleaning solvent and a hose to wash it all off. I left it outside to dry off and just had to soak up mentally what just happen. Oh man it was pretty funny, but the most amazing part is that me and momma still got our day together just to relax even after all of that. But the crappy part of the day is both the kids are getting sick. It started yesterday for Chase and just hit full blown for him today and just started for little Gracie. I hope they feel better soon because we feel so helpless when they are sick. They are just like me and Ash when they get sick they get all clingy and crabby and just don't know what they want or which way they are going. It sucks.... i know this sounds messed up but i hope it doesn't get to me and Ash especially me because i shut the hell down and cant function i turn into a little kid again so in seance momma has 3 kids to take care of. but i hope just as much that it doesn't hit Ash because i don't like seeing her in pain and not being able to fix it for her. Well that is about all i have for this blog so im going to sign off and snuggle up with momma before we head off to bed after her show. It really has been one great day in light of all the fun stuff that happen today. good night all and comeback soon lol.

The past few days in one

Ok so really I know what the title says but really its about the last 3 days in one blog.. Where to start?! How bout Monday, to start the day off I of course had to go to work. But when I got off Ash wanted to have a "Girls" day with just her and Gracie, so I had a "Boys" day with Chase. It was great him and I went out cruizin a little, went to the auto parts store to get the brake pads and rotors for the Expo. Then we took another little drive to GameStop picked up a couple games one for him and one for me. Then it was time to go home, Let him play the Wii for a bit then ate lunch, Then the girls got home and we messed arround for a little bit then I started to change the brakes on the truck. Man did it feel good to work on a vehicle again its been like 3 months since I did anything automecanical maybe longer. I dont know what it is but working on any vehicle just brings joy to me, I cant wait to get the kids involved with it. Chase is already starting to get a little interested. Everytime I go out to the garage he wants to be out there with me, I really cant wait for my little angel to get into it. We (Ash and I) want Grace to be able to pull up on the side of a freeway to some dude having car problems and be like "you want me to fix it"? or if she brakes down some one pulls up you need help? "Nope I got it". And on top of all that i want momma to start getting out there with me and tinkering around so when she needs help she can handel too. Any way got off on a tangent on that one lol. So I got the brakes all done then we went out for dinner. After dinner we got back to the house and Ash wanted to go to walmart for something, so we put the kids down to bed for the night and she left. I was outside about an hour or so later and I came back in the house and not looking I hear "Hey daddy" holy shit I jumped back and "What the hell are you doing? get back to your room". Man that scared the shit out of me, he was supposed to be in his room asleep. But no that little booger is short enough that I didnt see him over the couch and I hear that when the house is dead quiet. WTF (I think I peed a little) That was for you baby. So to wrap this day up Ash got back from Walmart with some Holloween stuff to decorate the house and yard with, needless to say it was a great day. Moving on to Tuesday, really didnt do much tried to finance a truck but since my credit i JACKED no go. Besides it wasnt worth the asking price, so were just going to stick to the original plan and get one at the beginging of the year. The last part of the night me and momma had some time with each other wich is great, I love just slowing down for the day and snuggling up with her. It gets rid of the bad or tough days and just washes it all away when we are holding eachother, there is no other place that I would rather be on any given day then with my bestfriend, My love, My solemate, My insperation, My wife it is seriously the best place in the world just cause we have so much love for each other. We talked abut this the other day but we agree. Never would have imagined that you can love someone even more the following day, and just when you think there is no way you can love anyone more then you love them BAAAAM the next day they do something or make you feel something that makes you love them even more then the day before. Wich leads me to the final part of this post, So as most of you know Ash and I are tattoo junkies. She has a theme on her left arm (kind of) and here it is, She has 12-28 (the 12 is spelt out and the 28 is in roaman numeral) up on her left shoulder and on her left wrist she has Crossed Anchors with a heart and a key hole in the middle of the anchors. So now she wants a Hibiscus flower (or 2) on her left shoulder to become a half sleeve and wrap in with the 12-28, So I figured since her left side is mostly for me/us why dont I draw the tat for her and have our guy trace it and work his magic on it. She loved the idea and that is what I have been doing since yesterday and its looking great, cant wait till she gets it. Im also planning on finnishing my half sleeve (going to be a full sleeve) on my left arm. All I have left is the inside of my arm, its a biomech piece and the inside of my arm is going to be 2 dog tags and a key. On the dog tags is going to be Chase B. Jansen 02-14-06 and the other is going to be Grace E. Jansen 06-18-08. The key I mentioned is going to be an old rustic roll down desk key type (and that is the key to the heart on the anchors on Ash's wrist. All of this is going to be in kind of a display case or a "shadow box" imbedded into my arm with hoses and what ever else our artist has in mind, Going to be Sweeeeeeeeeet!!! Then today I thought about what I wanted on my Right arm yes I am going to have a full sleeve on my left and a half sleeve on my right, but anyway on my right I am going to throw a coyfish and other water ocean type stuff but in the mix after the dog tags and key idea I realized that I have left another important person out of the loop...... Nathin so since he is a Capricorn so now that Ash and I just figured out what his sign lookes like I need to get back to the drawing board..... Well that is about it, im running out of things to type about tonight. Till next time once again thanks for taking the time reading my rambels lol. Good night all.

Oh what a day!

Oh where to start? The beginning of the day wasn't so eventful but then again it never is. With the exception of Grace again for the 2nd day in a row getting up at friggin 0 dark 30 (at least 5am) when Ash and I are trying to get to 0700 at least. then she didn't want to go back to sleep of course so neither of us fell back asleep (even tho I did try sorry baby) but wasn't happening. Got up went to work came home as usual nothing to special with the exception of coming home. That is always a plus for me! The fun really started when I remembered about this lovely database that us RDC's use that can find any one anywhere no matter what branch they are in so I guess it was at work when it started. Anyway I found this kid that told Ash at work that he don't care if its a first class he would just tell them to F off. (them being me) And that really gets under my skin because we (RDC's) put a lot of time into training these fuckers about the ropes of the Navy and who to respect and kids like this are just here for a paycheck, they could care less about defending the country and it REALLY PISSES ME OFF. Well long story short this kid told Ash that he was a 3rd class OHHHHHHH NO buddy hes a FR (Fireman Recruit an E-1 the bottom of the totem pole) and he has the balls to say he would tell a 1st class with 12 years in the Navy to fuck off!!!!! Bring it, Ill show you the Boatswainsmate side of the fuckin fence you little prick.:) me hostile NOOOOOO just don't stand for disrespect to my family or me. Moving on someone had posted something to a comment one of our good friends put up on a FB status post and then Ash had gotten into it with her so of course I had to put my 2 cents in lol. People really don't know what us RDC's put up with at all and that is what really hurts. We take these kids up to 88 of them in one division and force them to sleep in different environments, what i mean by that is taking different people from all over and putting them together in one place for 8 weeks and telling them this is what you NEED to do and this is how you NEED to act. When they don't we need to break them of the "This is how i used to do it" and turn them into well disciplined basically trained physically fit sailors. Its time consuming when I was "on push" it was a 18 to 20 hour day 7 days a week! No bullshit. We don't get paid enough for what we do. we get the thugs (or the ones who think they are) and have to turn them into the Navy way. So for someone to say "that's not a nice thing to say about them, how would you feel if that was said" type of crap. its just GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Now on to the most important part of the night, As most of you know Ash started working last week as a waitress and has been busting her ass. How do I know? Because its my wife and I know she would not do anything less then the best she can. She is dedicated to everything she does, has a huge heart and just loves knowing she can accomplish something. But the place she works at isn't really the best place and they are cheap ass's, I feel bad for her she can not catch a break people aren't tipping as much as they should or not at all. Come on now every one who is anyone knows how hard it is to do that job. Don't you flippin people know that she has 3 others that she waits on hand and foot day in and day out. She has another 24X7 365 day job that she is the BEST at and its called being a mother.. so for people just getting food cooked for them and delivered to their table or "hey can you get me a beer", or putting up with insignificant pricks that hit on her all night even when she tells them to back off (in her own words) then you don't tip.. FUCK YOU get your own fucking beer or food is what I would tell them. I love her to death and would do anything for her but I feel so weak that I cant fix this for her. If it at least paid a little better it would be ok but baby you don't get paid enough for what you do and unlike my job you can quit. I don't know how many times I have wanted to quit but I cant and that hurts too. Just knowing what I am missing out on every day (when I am gone) kills, but it also makes me great full for the time I do have with this great family we created together. I think that is enough for tonight. Night all and thank you.

The love of my life

Ok so not to much to talk about today so I thought i would gloat a little bit. I'm going to dedicate this one to my wife Ashleigh. We have been married going on 4 years in December. She is seriously the BEST thing that has ever happen to me (next to giving birth to our beautiful children). She took me from a bad place in life and showed me so much more. To catch you all up a little I have been married before but it was a BAD relation ship. She (my X-wife) took my back bone and walked all over it for the 4 years we were married it was horrible we fought every day it was just down right nasty. I was depressed everyday and thought I was good for nothing because that is the way I had become accustom to. Then after the 3rd separation leading to the divorce (thank GOD) I met this beautiful caring woman Ashleigh. And just let me clear it up she found me on Myspace of all places lol. The first night I met her i knew that she was finally the one, she was so beautiful I cant think of words to explain it. I know she felt the same thing it was like something clicked in the both of us. My divorce was final December 23 and Ashleigh and I got married December 28th 2005. She was so beautiful again on the day we got married but then again she is always beautiful even when she was 8.5months prego with both Chase and Grace. Now you wonder why we got married so early? well here are my reasons I knew she was the one like i said from the start. She is so mature for her age, she has a plan on where and what she wants to do in life, she is the best mother ever, Caring for everything and don't take shit from no one. momma can defiantly take care of her self, but on top of all that she lets me take care of her, and i know she puts on a front every now and then to make me feel better about doing something , She is not afraid to speak her mind no matter what people may think about what she says. She is a great listener, wonderful friend if that is what i needed at that point in time. But the most important thing that i can think of right now is SHE LOVES ME and shows it everyday in every little way you can think of. yeah we have had our problems but who the flip hasn't if you haven't had issues your a friggin lire. A good friend once told me and yes i stole it "you can have bad days, weeks, months and even years, but its all worth it for just one more day." I know there are other great and wonderful things i could say about my baby but you would be here for about 10 years just reading this little blog. so to be fair to you all I'm going to end this one just for today and wish you all a good night and again thanks for taking time out of your day to read my blog.

New to blogging

Well where to start off? I am new to blogging so just bear with me on this one. Lest just start off on today. For the past couple of days our daughter has been waking up at 0500 or 0530 and this morning I was not having it so I went down and made her a bottle and that was that. of course after Ash told me maybe a bottle will work, lol. So then we went back to sleep, not to sure on when Chase got up but what ever we got to sleep in till 0800. Came down stairs and Ash made a wonderful pancake b-fast. got it all cleaned up and then we decided we were still tired. so about 0900 momma (Ash) went and took Grace up to take her nap and I stayed downstairs with a upset stomach. I don't know how that happen but after I layed on the couch and woke up to Chase going "Daddy" "what" "Can I have this" and me being still asleep trying to focus on what he has "yes" little did I remember it was a sucker. Then woke up again to him asking the same question again. then it really clicked "how many of those have you had?" "2" was the response i got from a 3yo. Looked around and to my surprise there were at least 5 wrappers and sucker sticks. But that is my son. Flashing forward, we have a kitten that just does not come around. he is the epitome of what people don't like about cats. Every time we come up to him he runs, we never see him so were housing a loaner for crying out loud. anyway we had posted him on Craigslist (great sight) for free to a good home. We had some one interested and came to see him with their other new kitten. Well of course I went to get Marly and he ran, I must have chased him from the kitchen to the living room at least 20 times. Until finally he had enough ran and jumped over the baby gate by the front door where they were standing, he leaped over the gate onto ol boys leg and off to Chase's room upstairs. So of course like a dumb ass I followed him locked him and I in my sons room, chased him again for 5 more min till finally I caught him. OHHHHHHHHHH boy he did not like that hissing and everything till finally he turned his head and FLIPPIN bit me 3 times on the ring finger. he didn't just bite he took a friggin chunk out on that 3rd bite. Piercing through my fingernail and taking a HUGE chunk out of my finger tip. Oh man was i pissed. Any other time I have ever gotten hurt I was "oh that sucks" type of thing, not this time, down stairs I went with the cat in the left hand by the scruff and my finger bleeding on the right. "I'm sorry but I cant let you take him after he did this to a human I don't want to know what else he is capable of doing." ran back up stairs to momma and damn near FAINTED, i don't know what came over me she took the cat from me locked him up and came back to run my finger under water. By then i was on my knees in shock that this just frigging happen, hand shaking bad breathing heavy. I have never felt like that before. She got the bleeding to stop but it does need stitches. F that I'm not going after seeing what happen to Ash's finger lol sorry baby. I wanted so bad to kill that cat, but I am glad that it happen to me and not anyone else especially the kids. I would have killed it right there. you can say what you want about me but when it comes to my wife and children you better step the F off. That was the real exciting part of my day, now I'm just sitting here writing this and waiting for my lovely wife to get home from work. the kids are asleep and soon to be me as well. So in saying that have a good night everyone and thanks for taking your time to read about my day.